BEST DIVOICE LETTER EVER !!!!

[Asbo Mick]

The Best Divorce Letter, ever!

FIRST LETTER:
My Dear husband:
I'm writing this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you..
I've been a good wife to you for the last 20 years &
I have nothing to show for it, and the last 2 weeks
have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that
you left your job today which was the last straw.

Last week, you came home & you didn't even
notice I had a new hairstyle, had cooked your
favourite meal & even wore a brand new nightie.
You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep
after watching your TV soaps.
You don't tell me you love me any more; you
don't want sex or anything that connects us
as husband & wife. Either you're cheating on
me or you don't love me any more; whatever
the case, I'm gone.

Your EX-Wife.
Don't try to find me. Your BROTHER & I are
moving to New Zealand together! Have a great life!
REPLY:

Dear Ex-wife,
Nothing has made my day more than receiving
your letter. It's true you & I have been married for
20 years, although a good woman is a far cry
from what you've been. I watch TV soaps so much
because they drown out your constant whining
& *****ing. Too bad that doesn't work any more..
I DID notice when you got a hair do last week, but
the 1st thing that came to mind was 'You look just
like a boy!'
Since my father raised me not to say
anything, if you can't say something nice, I didn't
comment......and when you cooked my favourite meal,
you must have got me confused with MY BROTHER
because I haven't eaten prawns for 7 years.
About the new nightie: I turned away from you because
the $299.99 price tag was still on it, & I prayed it was a
coincidence that my brother had just borrowed $300
from me that morning.
After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could work it
out. So when I won the $20 million Lotto, on Saturday,
I left my job & bought 2 tickets for us to Paris , but when
I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a
reason, I guess.
I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted.
My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you
won't get a dollar from me.
So take care.
Signed,
Your Ex-Husband, Rich As Hell & Free!
P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this, but my
brother Carl was born Carla. I hope that's not a
problem.

[Nancy]

ROFLMBO!!!  Priceless!

[Asbo Mick]

So are you Sweet Cheeks ....Priceless ...Luv Mick ...XXX

[Nancy]

Mick, you are way too sweet...I guess that is ONE reason I love you so much!!!  My regards to Mavis!