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Comment by Asbo Mick on July 4, 2013 at 10:53pm

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Comment by Asbo Mick on July 4, 2013 at 8:04pm

Peter Kay Funny Man

http://youtu.be/Uv2fVaHSISw

Comment by Asbo Mick on July 4, 2013 at 7:46pm

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Comment by Asbo Mick on July 4, 2013 at 4:25pm

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Comment by wildplum on July 4, 2013 at 8:17am

this could be the beginnings of a new dance craze ...of course the cat would be optional!! :-)

Comment by Asbo Mick on July 2, 2013 at 10:38pm

Charlie was installing a brand new front door and found that one of the hinges was missing.
He asked his wife, Mary Jane, if she would go to Home Depot and pick up a hinge.

Mary agreed to go....While she was waiting for the manager to finish serving a customer, her eye
caught a beautiful bathroom faucet.
When the manager was finished, Mary asked him, "How much is that faucet?"

The manager replied, "That's our best faucet.  It's gold plated faucet. The price is $500.00."

Mary exclaimed, "My goodness, that is a very expensive faucet. It's certainly out of my price range."

She then proceeded to describe the hinge that Charlie had sent her to buy.

The manager said that he had them in stock and went into the storeroom
to get one............................................

From the storeroom the manager yelled, "Ma'am, do you wanna screw for the hinge?!"

Mary paused for a moment...and then shouted back, "No, but I will for the faucet!!!"

Comment by Asbo Mick on July 2, 2013 at 5:37pm

The American Boy

SON:

Father, look up, and see that flag!
How gracefully it flies!
Those pretty stripes, they seem to be
A rainbow in the skies.

FATHER:

It is your country's flag my boy,
And proudly drinks the light,
O'er ocean's wave, in foreign climes,
A symbol of our might.

SON:

Father, what fearful noise is that,
Now thundering in the clouds?
Why do they, cheering, wave their hat,
And rush along in crowds?

FATHER:

It is the voice of cannonry,
The glad shouts of the free,
This is a day of memory,
'Tis FREEDOM'S JUBILEE!

SON:

I wish that I was now a man,
I'd free my country too,
And cheer as loudly as the rest,
But Father, why don't you?

FATHER:

I'm getting old and weak, but still,
My heart is big with joy,
I've witnessed many a day like this,
Shout you aloud, my boy!

SON:

HURRAY FOR FREEDOM'S JUBILEE,
God bless our native land,
And may I live to hold the boon
Of freedom in my hand.

FATHER:

We4ll done my boy, grow up and love,
The land that gave you birth,
A land where freedom loves to dwell...
A paradise on earth!

Comment by Asbo Mick on July 2, 2013 at 5:25pm

Yer lookin good Nancy

Comment by Asbo Mick on July 2, 2013 at 5:19pm

Paddy Reilly had long heard the stories of an amazing family tradition.
It seems that his father, grandfather and great-grandfather had all been able to walk on water on their 18th birthday.

On that special day, they'd each walked across the lake to the pub on the far side for their first legal drink.

So, when Paddy's 18th birthday came around, he and his pal Mick, took a
boat out to the middle of the lake, Paddy, stepped out of the boat and
nearly drowned!
Mick just barely managed to pull him to safety.
Furious and confused, Paddy, went to see his grandmother.

'Nana,' he asked, "Tis me 18th birthday, so why can't I walk 'cross the
lake like me father, his father, and his father before him?"
Nana
Reilly looked deeply into Paddy's, troubled brown eyes and said,
"Because yer father, yer grandfather and yer great-grandfather were all
born in December, when the lake is frozen, and you were born in August,
ya bloody eejit!"

Comment by Nancy on July 2, 2013 at 1:49am

LOL!

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